When I flew back to Zambia there was an hour delay before departing. Once we had taken off the captain announced the flight would take nine and a half hours instead of the planned seven. This meant I would now miss my connecting flight in Johannesburg and probably have to spend the night in a hotel. The same applied to the lady next to me. She got quite upset with the delay and treated the air hostess “not so nice” (Ok, she was just plain rude). For the entire nine and a half hours she was stressed and cranky. I must say I’ve sat next to more pleasant passengers before. This time I skipped the “business or pleasure”question.
She and I were in the same situation, but she was on the verge of freaking out while I was calm. Are we inherently different people, that we handle situations like this differently? Are some people just naturally stressed or anxious? NO. It has all to do with thoughts and your thinking.
Five years ago I would have handled the delay and accompanied troubles a lot different too. But I changed my thinking and that made a huge impact. In fact it changed my entire life for the better.
Your thinking shapes your reality. If you don’t take control of your thoughts, your thoughts will take control of you and life happens to you. Take control and you can shape your life the way you want it to be. It is a universal truth that works for anyone and everyone. It is working right now whether you are aware of it or not; whether you like it or not.
Most of us have never been taught how this process works or how you can use your own thoughts to your benefit. The mechanics behind the process are really very simple and easy to use. How this is not a basic part of our parenting and schooling, just like maths and reading, eludes me. But that is a story for another time.
You are here now, that is what matters.
How you benefit from taking control
Learning to get along with your thoughts, instead of drowning in them, is crucial if you want to live a happy and joyful life. It is a lot of fun though and you can often see change happening right from the start. It affects every aspect of your life. To name just a few:
- More overall joy in your day to day life
- Increased Confidence
- Less and less stress
- Coincidences and little miracles happen more often
- Stronger, more personal and more intimate relationships
The list goes on. Name something you want to change in your life (e.g losing weight) and you can do it with the power of thought.
How thoughts shape and create your life
Everything starts in the mind. Something can simply not exist if it was not first in the mind. Take designing a chair. An idea for a new chair design doesn’t simply pop out of nowhere. Purposeful thought has to be put in first. Shapes and colours have to be thought of first and then transferred into reality.
Even if you could just hammer pieces together, without actually drawing a design, your thoughts still create a chair in your mind. Don’t believe me? Just try it. Try building a chair without picturing one in your mind. There probably is one in your mind now already.
The same happens in your day to day life. For example, if you are worried that you are going to be late for work, you probably will be. In your mind you are picturing yourself being stuck in traffic and being late. You “see” (in your mind that is) your boss shouting at you for being late again. By having these thoughts you basically created that reality.
Next time you run late again and you say to yourself “well I was late last time, so I will probably be late again”, digging yourself in even deeper. You start to believe you are an unlucky person.
On the other hand, if you pictured yourself being on time, having a lucky green light streak, see yourself walking into your office in time, you most likely will be on time.
Thoughts create your reality, from the littlest things (being late) to the bigger things (building a dream house). If you are not aware of your thoughts and what you say to yourself, you create your own reality without even knowing that you do. Change your thoughts and you break the vicious circle.
Just by having positive or negative thoughts alone doesn’t necessarily turn them into reality. It’s when they are fueled by a strong belief that things get interesting. So often the thoughts we have are based on false beliefs. Wherever you picked up those beliefs (i.e. from social/cultural/religious conditioning) you can change them. I wrote a useful free guide for you, so you can start changing your reality now.
Like with any skill it is a gradual process and the more you practice the better you become at it. Your brain easily falls back into old habits, so in the beginning you need a bit of discipline to keep on track. Initially you will need a lot of purposeful focus on changing your thoughts, but after a while it becomes second nature. It becomes part of your subconscious.
Remember what it was like learning how to driving a car for the first time? You had to think of so many things all at the same time. Three pedals to control with two feet, while moving the gear-stick in the right direction, adhering to the speed limit and not crashing into a tree! In the beginning it required all your attention and focus to do this right, but after not too long it all became second nature to you. So it is with changing your thoughts.
Perhaps focus on one area that you want to change, don’t try and change everything all at once. A bit of focus makes all the difference.
Give it a shot. Try out my free guide and see how it works for you and let me know how it works for you. Please don’t be that lady next to me on the plane.
Be a happy passenger :)